Something we can all relate to in our lives is some form of loss or tragedy, no one wants to experience it, but at some point we all have to. That is the common denominator, how we deal with or work through that loss is entirely up to us. We cannot control our future, but we can control our actions. We chose our own path; is it one of further destruction or one that we can learn from? The harder road is the one we take where we actually have learned from. It takes more work on our parts, more heartache in some cases but in the end the most rewarding. For some it is the road less travelled.
Choosing to be the victim, for me, seems to be more work. You smile less, you laugh less, you are not your true self. You lose yourself , and ultimately lose out on life. We all deal with things in a different way, some take longer than others to move on, that in itself is neither right, nor is it wrong. What is wrong is when you become a "toxic" energy and in turn start to take others down with you. Others that were there in the beginning to help dust yourself off, and help you take a deep breath, put one foot in front of the other and move forward from the past. Those that helped comfort and support, lend an ear, give a hug and wipe the tears. Those that try to show you that you are stronger than what has happened, you, as a person, are stronger than the situation or the other person that hurt you. I believe that we all are blessed with these kind of people in our lives, whether we know it or not, there is someone there that wants to help and wants to see you help yourself.
I truly am blessed with an army of people from family to friends, and friends that are family. I feel that some I have taken for granted, though not on purpose, just could have shown a better appreciation for the role they play in my life and my family's life. I find that I have guarded my heart to new relationships as I'm sure we all have for obvious reasons. I am the one to push away or step back, and I am the one to just trust the future.
As tough as I try to portray myself, I really am not hard as nails. With an outpouring of love and support from my true friends and family, today I woke up with the sun shining through my window, trees moving freely in the wind, and the birds singing their songs welcoming a new day. I decided that yes, it is a new day, the past is the past, and there is always a tomorrow. I learned this week that there are two fantastic women willing to get to know me and wanting the best for me. As I do for them, and that ultimately I am thankful for what has happened, because from a bad situation and toxic relationship sprouted two more soldiers in my army. I look forward to good times, good conversation, much laughter and a positive outlook for things that have happened and things that are to come our way.
I know I do not say thank-you enough to my circle of family and friends for their constant love and support, so I say it now. Thanks for backing me, lifting me up and just loving me for me through the good times and the not so good times. Without all of you I would not have the great life that that I live.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
My Childbirth Truths
I've been thinking about the birth of my girls, and yes, two of the best days of my life so far, goes without saying, but also two of the strangest days of my life. Since I was a little girl I KNEW I wanted to be a mom, I just didn't know exactly how it would feel to deliver them. You can read all about pregnancy /childbirth and typically what to expect, but until you have gone through it, you will never truly know.
I never had the pleasure of going into labour "naturally", both times I had the opportunity to have my body pumped with synthetic hormones to trick my girls into thinking that it was time to come out. There is this gel that was used for Emma, that was stuck up my unit, which was to make the uterus go into contractions. We waited for many hours for this action to take place and all that happened down there was an annoying sensation that my ovaries were on fire, and that I wanted to stick ice cubes up there to turn down the heat. Next came the hormones pumped through my veins. That brought on more action, and I was told do walk around the halls to help move things along.
With your first baby, things tend to be slower in the delivery department, your body hasn't done it before, it knows that it has to, but isn't too sure which way to shoot the baby out. There are many" techniques" that the nurses will give you to help open up your cervix and get it to dilate to the winning number of 10 cm. I did laps around the hospital, sat on an exercise ball and rolled around the room, nothing was making Emma come out any faster. So more hormones were given. That brought on contractions hard and fast, but still I would not dilate. I was in a lot of pain, but could not get the ever loving epidural until I was in the right "window" of opportunity. So instead they gave me "laughing gas". It made me laugh alright, at the idea that this stuff would take the "edge" off. It was making my visitors high more so than myself.
Finally I was ready for the epidural, (and if you are a woman that did this without this form of heaven -on- earth, you are my hero, a little on the Extreme Sports side, but still, my hero!), they brought the forms in for me to sign so I wouldn't try and sue them if the dude slipped and put me in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I said," I promise I won't sue you, you are like my new best friend if you can make me comfortable." The best part was being told to hold still between contractions, (uh, right, I'll hold still but you have like 2 minutes to shove that huge needle into my spine and make my world a happy place for the duration of this miracle of birth.) He made my day in two deep breaths, my body was numb from my armpits down, I was peeing in a bag and finally giving my husband looks of "love" instead of "you are never touching me again".
I fell asleep for little catnaps of 20 minutes here and there and finally I was ready to push. And push, and push, and push, for 6 hours straight. The epidural had worn off and it was time for more, the Dude came back and did his wonderful job of making women in labour comfortable.( I bet he has like a gazillion "friends" on Facebook!) More pushing, pushing, pushing and nothing.
We had to call in more Doctors to help get her out, some complications presented itself, so another team of specialists were lining the room waiting for Emma. There must have been 10 or more strangers in the room all watching the action coming from the lower region of my body. And when you hear women tell you that once you've had a kid all modesty that you had, will be out the window; it's true. It was like Old MacDonald's Farm by the time she finally came out of my body. " With a snip, snip, here and forceps going there, here a push, there a pull, everywhere a scream heard! OHHHHHHHH, Old Mac Catharine had her first baby....E-I-E- OOUUUCCCHH!" We heard her cry and all was well, I was tired, so very tired and have been ever since. But it wasn't too bad since I went on to have Elise. (Although when it was time for Elise, I had the Epidural Dude ordered and ready to go by the time we parked the truck!)
This time, my husband did not help me out, as per mine and his request. ( Seems as though seeing how my "stuff" can morph itself from "pleasure zone" to "baby landing strip", didn't sit well with him.) So my sister "in-law", Teresa, was my coach. Corey was allowed in the room until it was push time.
Teresa was a great help, she put up with my complaining, my moaning, and my moments where I thought I was being funny while high on morphine. But really, I was being funny she just didn't get it until a couple of years later. I had seen the movie, The 40 Year Old Virgin, and while he is getting his chest waxed, through the pain he screams, "OHHHH KELLY CLARKSON!" So after a painful contraction I yelled the same! (She hadn't seen the movie nor did the nurse that was in the room, so "looks" were exchanged between the two of them and I was written off as high, not funny! )
Corey made the comment, "Why are you moaning so much you just had an epidural it should all be good." To which Teresa answered for me, "It's like you have to poop really bad and can't! You have to hold it in no matter how uncomfortable you are!"
"Oh." And that is when he made his exit. (smart!)
Once I was able to push Elise out, things went much smoother than with Emma, no snipping, no forceps just some long pushes and out she came. Tired again, but like I said before, I've been tired ever since.
After these precious little miracles are born, your body goes through some changes that will be "unknown" to you, let alone the people that surround and live with you. My hormone balance was so out of whack that I cried if Corey didn't say "hello" in the right tone, or I wanted to rip his nose off if he was breathing too loud while sleeping. Every minute was hit or miss with the tears or laughter or anger, but don't worry, you'll balance out in about 6 to 8 weeks!
Through it all, of course I'm happy to have had them, but NO, we are not having more babies. With every sneeze, cough or jump, I am reminded of the "labour" I went through to bring these beautiful girls into the world, and I admire my stretch marks as trophies to a job well done. My body will never be the same nor will my life. Although, I am blessed to have healthy kids, and blessed that with each "time out" I give them, at the end of the day, I also get an "I love you Mommy." And that my friends was worth showing my "womanhood" to the world, and crying over spilled milk, or maybe it was the milk that engorged my breasts, due to pain or just how unbelievably HUGE they were! But that is a whole other chapter!
I never had the pleasure of going into labour "naturally", both times I had the opportunity to have my body pumped with synthetic hormones to trick my girls into thinking that it was time to come out. There is this gel that was used for Emma, that was stuck up my unit, which was to make the uterus go into contractions. We waited for many hours for this action to take place and all that happened down there was an annoying sensation that my ovaries were on fire, and that I wanted to stick ice cubes up there to turn down the heat. Next came the hormones pumped through my veins. That brought on more action, and I was told do walk around the halls to help move things along.
With your first baby, things tend to be slower in the delivery department, your body hasn't done it before, it knows that it has to, but isn't too sure which way to shoot the baby out. There are many" techniques" that the nurses will give you to help open up your cervix and get it to dilate to the winning number of 10 cm. I did laps around the hospital, sat on an exercise ball and rolled around the room, nothing was making Emma come out any faster. So more hormones were given. That brought on contractions hard and fast, but still I would not dilate. I was in a lot of pain, but could not get the ever loving epidural until I was in the right "window" of opportunity. So instead they gave me "laughing gas". It made me laugh alright, at the idea that this stuff would take the "edge" off. It was making my visitors high more so than myself.
Finally I was ready for the epidural, (and if you are a woman that did this without this form of heaven -on- earth, you are my hero, a little on the Extreme Sports side, but still, my hero!), they brought the forms in for me to sign so I wouldn't try and sue them if the dude slipped and put me in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I said," I promise I won't sue you, you are like my new best friend if you can make me comfortable." The best part was being told to hold still between contractions, (uh, right, I'll hold still but you have like 2 minutes to shove that huge needle into my spine and make my world a happy place for the duration of this miracle of birth.) He made my day in two deep breaths, my body was numb from my armpits down, I was peeing in a bag and finally giving my husband looks of "love" instead of "you are never touching me again".
I fell asleep for little catnaps of 20 minutes here and there and finally I was ready to push. And push, and push, and push, for 6 hours straight. The epidural had worn off and it was time for more, the Dude came back and did his wonderful job of making women in labour comfortable.( I bet he has like a gazillion "friends" on Facebook!) More pushing, pushing, pushing and nothing.
We had to call in more Doctors to help get her out, some complications presented itself, so another team of specialists were lining the room waiting for Emma. There must have been 10 or more strangers in the room all watching the action coming from the lower region of my body. And when you hear women tell you that once you've had a kid all modesty that you had, will be out the window; it's true. It was like Old MacDonald's Farm by the time she finally came out of my body. " With a snip, snip, here and forceps going there, here a push, there a pull, everywhere a scream heard! OHHHHHHHH, Old Mac Catharine had her first baby....E-I-E- OOUUUCCCHH!" We heard her cry and all was well, I was tired, so very tired and have been ever since. But it wasn't too bad since I went on to have Elise. (Although when it was time for Elise, I had the Epidural Dude ordered and ready to go by the time we parked the truck!)
This time, my husband did not help me out, as per mine and his request. ( Seems as though seeing how my "stuff" can morph itself from "pleasure zone" to "baby landing strip", didn't sit well with him.) So my sister "in-law", Teresa, was my coach. Corey was allowed in the room until it was push time.
Teresa was a great help, she put up with my complaining, my moaning, and my moments where I thought I was being funny while high on morphine. But really, I was being funny she just didn't get it until a couple of years later. I had seen the movie, The 40 Year Old Virgin, and while he is getting his chest waxed, through the pain he screams, "OHHHH KELLY CLARKSON!" So after a painful contraction I yelled the same! (She hadn't seen the movie nor did the nurse that was in the room, so "looks" were exchanged between the two of them and I was written off as high, not funny! )
Corey made the comment, "Why are you moaning so much you just had an epidural it should all be good." To which Teresa answered for me, "It's like you have to poop really bad and can't! You have to hold it in no matter how uncomfortable you are!"
"Oh." And that is when he made his exit. (smart!)
Once I was able to push Elise out, things went much smoother than with Emma, no snipping, no forceps just some long pushes and out she came. Tired again, but like I said before, I've been tired ever since.
After these precious little miracles are born, your body goes through some changes that will be "unknown" to you, let alone the people that surround and live with you. My hormone balance was so out of whack that I cried if Corey didn't say "hello" in the right tone, or I wanted to rip his nose off if he was breathing too loud while sleeping. Every minute was hit or miss with the tears or laughter or anger, but don't worry, you'll balance out in about 6 to 8 weeks!
Through it all, of course I'm happy to have had them, but NO, we are not having more babies. With every sneeze, cough or jump, I am reminded of the "labour" I went through to bring these beautiful girls into the world, and I admire my stretch marks as trophies to a job well done. My body will never be the same nor will my life. Although, I am blessed to have healthy kids, and blessed that with each "time out" I give them, at the end of the day, I also get an "I love you Mommy." And that my friends was worth showing my "womanhood" to the world, and crying over spilled milk, or maybe it was the milk that engorged my breasts, due to pain or just how unbelievably HUGE they were! But that is a whole other chapter!
Monday, May 3, 2010
Stress Turns Sweet
It's been a quiet week for blogging, but a hectic week none the less! Still on the "potty mission", and that is just never ending, well the laundry is never ending! We can put a man on the moon, but we can't make potty training a breeze,(well maybe someone has, or at least they claim to, if I pay them $47.95, they'll tell me their secret to training in just 3 short days! Yup, my lily white a** you can!!!) As you can tell we aren't quite there yet with the potty, but I hope it will be before she's 20! So enough bathroom talk, I thought I'd finally share something else......
I had to bring the girls with me to hip hop, Corey had ball hockey and I can't miss any classes, it's crunch time and I have a lot of practicing to do! The girls were so excited to see Mommy's version of what groovin' looks like, and I was just excited to get out of the house from potty lockdown.
I gave them both the "talk" all the way to class,
"Be good. Don't run around, don't scream, just sit and watch, okay? Do you both hear me?"
I hear, " Yes Mom!" from just one little voice in the back seat.
"ELISE, DO - YOU - HEAR- ME?"
(giggle) "YETH Mommy.....I no run 'round..." (giggle)
I swear she was crossing her fingers behind her back while she said that because she so did NOT hear me!
Warm up begins, music pumping, bodies moving,( mine cracking), and you can just see Elise's "inner devil" come to life from her toes to the top of her head. She gets up watching me, watch her, I give her the stink eye, she looks away, and shakes her little booty. Small gestures at first and then all out, she got so excited she did what she thought was going to be a somersault, but turned into a flip, and she whacked her back. To her rescue I go to make sure she could breathe! All good, she shook it off. Again I tell her to sit and watch. I join back into the warm up and off she goes again, shake, shake, shakin' her groove thang!
We start the stretching portion of our warm up, (not my favourite part for so many reasons), and Elise decides that this would be a great time to join in again. She's trying to copy us and did a pretty good job, until , she fell on her head. So she figured that it would be fun to climb all over me in the middle of some kind of leg stretching deal. ( It hurts without a toddler on your back let alone with one moving all over you!) I try to move her back to her spot by Emma who is being soooooo good, but as soon as I did that she was up. I decide to just ignore her and let her have fun. Ignoring Elise is just not possible......
Now it's time for push-ups! Elise gets on my back. The other ladies in the class start laughing, "Ha Ha, let's see how many you can do NOW!" I managed to do 9 "girl" push-ups. And then onto bicycle crunches. Now she's on my stomach and I'm hitting her in the back with my knees with each one, she says, "Mommy, no hittin' that's no nice!"
"Then go sit with Emma and you won't get hit!"
Of course that isn't part of her plan. We begin some sort of butt lifting thing and now I'm bouncing her off my stomach and she decides it would be a way better ride if she just jumped up and down! I think she knocked the wind out of me a few times!
Finally we're done and, I again, place Elise back in her spot by her sister whom is still being really good! We begin our routine and I thought I'd hear Elise protest and tell Niki to turn it down, as she does to me on a regular basis. But she didn't, apparently we were in the right environment for loud music, and my living room is not. She watches us for the first run through, and then after that it was a free for all. She was running from one end of the studio to the other, looking at herself in the mirror, just about got taken out by one of the dancers, all while screaming and laughing her little head off. I finally put the not- so- nice mommy voice on and get her to sit. She's none to impressed but does manage to sit for a few more minutes, and then the whining starts, "Are you done yet Mommy?"
"5 more minutes Elise, just 5 more minutes."
Emma asks me if I'm going to get a sticker when I'm done, (she gets one for tap and ballet) I said,
"No Mommy doesn't get a sticker."
Elise was having no part of that, and starts yelling at Niki, "My Mommy get a ticker! That no nice!" Thank goodness she couldn't hear her over the music, I tell her it's okay, I don't want one. Finally class has come to an end, it was so stressful, I should've just stayed home!
On our way out to the truck Emma says, "Wow Mommy, you're really good!"
I laugh, "Thanks Emma."
"I really liked it when you did like that and then like this," as she makes the gestures of the moves as best she can as I'm running with them to get the h-e -double hockey sticks out of there.
Again, I laugh, and thank her. She says, "Mommy, I think I'm proud of you like you do to me!"
And then, I smile....and the tears well up.....and I stop the mad rush to the truck.....give her a great big hug...."Thank-you Baby."
The anxiety of the recital is still fresh on my mind, but as long as Emma is there watching and proud of her Mom I know I can get through it. All the stomach cramps and feelings of nausea, dry mouth and sweats will be worth it in the end. I'll take her being proud of me while I can because not too far into the future, her pride may turn to embarrassment during those hormonal years. And "if" or "when" it does, I'll remember the day she said she was proud and hope that she does too.
I had to bring the girls with me to hip hop, Corey had ball hockey and I can't miss any classes, it's crunch time and I have a lot of practicing to do! The girls were so excited to see Mommy's version of what groovin' looks like, and I was just excited to get out of the house from potty lockdown.
I gave them both the "talk" all the way to class,
"Be good. Don't run around, don't scream, just sit and watch, okay? Do you both hear me?"
I hear, " Yes Mom!" from just one little voice in the back seat.
"ELISE, DO - YOU - HEAR- ME?"
(giggle) "YETH Mommy.....I no run 'round..." (giggle)
I swear she was crossing her fingers behind her back while she said that because she so did NOT hear me!
Warm up begins, music pumping, bodies moving,( mine cracking), and you can just see Elise's "inner devil" come to life from her toes to the top of her head. She gets up watching me, watch her, I give her the stink eye, she looks away, and shakes her little booty. Small gestures at first and then all out, she got so excited she did what she thought was going to be a somersault, but turned into a flip, and she whacked her back. To her rescue I go to make sure she could breathe! All good, she shook it off. Again I tell her to sit and watch. I join back into the warm up and off she goes again, shake, shake, shakin' her groove thang!
We start the stretching portion of our warm up, (not my favourite part for so many reasons), and Elise decides that this would be a great time to join in again. She's trying to copy us and did a pretty good job, until , she fell on her head. So she figured that it would be fun to climb all over me in the middle of some kind of leg stretching deal. ( It hurts without a toddler on your back let alone with one moving all over you!) I try to move her back to her spot by Emma who is being soooooo good, but as soon as I did that she was up. I decide to just ignore her and let her have fun. Ignoring Elise is just not possible......
Now it's time for push-ups! Elise gets on my back. The other ladies in the class start laughing, "Ha Ha, let's see how many you can do NOW!" I managed to do 9 "girl" push-ups. And then onto bicycle crunches. Now she's on my stomach and I'm hitting her in the back with my knees with each one, she says, "Mommy, no hittin' that's no nice!"
"Then go sit with Emma and you won't get hit!"
Of course that isn't part of her plan. We begin some sort of butt lifting thing and now I'm bouncing her off my stomach and she decides it would be a way better ride if she just jumped up and down! I think she knocked the wind out of me a few times!
Finally we're done and, I again, place Elise back in her spot by her sister whom is still being really good! We begin our routine and I thought I'd hear Elise protest and tell Niki to turn it down, as she does to me on a regular basis. But she didn't, apparently we were in the right environment for loud music, and my living room is not. She watches us for the first run through, and then after that it was a free for all. She was running from one end of the studio to the other, looking at herself in the mirror, just about got taken out by one of the dancers, all while screaming and laughing her little head off. I finally put the not- so- nice mommy voice on and get her to sit. She's none to impressed but does manage to sit for a few more minutes, and then the whining starts, "Are you done yet Mommy?"
"5 more minutes Elise, just 5 more minutes."
Emma asks me if I'm going to get a sticker when I'm done, (she gets one for tap and ballet) I said,
"No Mommy doesn't get a sticker."
Elise was having no part of that, and starts yelling at Niki, "My Mommy get a ticker! That no nice!" Thank goodness she couldn't hear her over the music, I tell her it's okay, I don't want one. Finally class has come to an end, it was so stressful, I should've just stayed home!
On our way out to the truck Emma says, "Wow Mommy, you're really good!"
I laugh, "Thanks Emma."
"I really liked it when you did like that and then like this," as she makes the gestures of the moves as best she can as I'm running with them to get the h-e -double hockey sticks out of there.
Again, I laugh, and thank her. She says, "Mommy, I think I'm proud of you like you do to me!"
And then, I smile....and the tears well up.....and I stop the mad rush to the truck.....give her a great big hug...."Thank-you Baby."
The anxiety of the recital is still fresh on my mind, but as long as Emma is there watching and proud of her Mom I know I can get through it. All the stomach cramps and feelings of nausea, dry mouth and sweats will be worth it in the end. I'll take her being proud of me while I can because not too far into the future, her pride may turn to embarrassment during those hormonal years. And "if" or "when" it does, I'll remember the day she said she was proud and hope that she does too.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Extreme Sports - Mom Style
Just when I THOUGHT life would coast for just a minute, Elise decided to step things up and get rid of her diaper! I tried a couple of months ago and she reminded me who was in control, and that folks, was NOT me. When asked by Emma's dance teacher week after week if Elise was a "Big Girl" yet, she always answered, "NO!" Seemingly annoyed more and more by the question, my niece decided that she would answer for Elise one day and said, "Nope, not today, maybe on Wednesday."
Many Wednesdays came and went until last Wednesday. Elise said, "Mommy, I want panties!" I didn't think about the "prediction" at first, and when I realized what day it was, I kind of got a shiver up my spine, that's weird.....I had to share it with the dance teacher, and her response was to remind her to ask Julie for some lotto numbers! (NO DOUBT!)
Like any sporting enthusiast, I have all the right equipment for these "outings", the potty, turning the back of my SUV into a personal oasis, for my "Big Girl" in training. A fold up potty seat, for the public washrooms so we don't lose her in the BIG toilets, and of course 62 changes of clothes for those just- in- case moments. She thinks it's pretty funny to go "pee" in the back of the truck as do passersby as they do a double take, just to make sure that they really are seeing what they are seeing. A couple of moms at ballet commented on my own port-a-potty system, but hey whatever works right! The pee MUST make it to the potty! And while "going" in the Costco washroom we made a few ladies laugh at the potty party we had after Elise made a deposit! I'm sure it was strange to hear clapping and cheering coming from the stall over, believe me it's weird to do it, but again, whatever works! Thank goodness my mother- in- law was there, as she explained what the big deal was!
And so for the last 4 days, my life has revolved around my almost three- year- old and the potty, and my latest blog entry is reduced to this.....I apologize!
I don't know how many times I have asked her, "Do you have to pee? Do you need to use the potty? Are you wet?" "How about now,..... now,........ now Elise,........ how about now?"
I am annoying myself let alone her, and most recently she answered, "NOOOO Mommy! Jeepers!"
Or my personal favourite so far, "Elise, going to the potty is a "poopy" job, but someone has to do it."
"Then YOU do it Mommy!" said after day two when I thought she had given up, but she didn't, she has persevered, each day drier than the last.
My quest right now is to convince her that poop goes in the same place, and not her pants. By day 4 this is still proving to be a problem, bribes of chocolate, a new toy, money, a vacation in the Bahamas, a day at the spa, are just not working. I know she'll finally let go and do it, in the mean time I've come up with some rules:
1) Elise is in control
2)I am NOT in control
3)When in doubt refer to rules number 1 and 2.
I must go and see if a potty break is in order! Until next time, my friends, wish us luck that we finally get our "poop in a group" and that my next entries are a little more profound than potty adventures!
Many Wednesdays came and went until last Wednesday. Elise said, "Mommy, I want panties!" I didn't think about the "prediction" at first, and when I realized what day it was, I kind of got a shiver up my spine, that's weird.....I had to share it with the dance teacher, and her response was to remind her to ask Julie for some lotto numbers! (NO DOUBT!)
We have had to venture out of the house a few times,( as much as I have wanted to stop the world on its axis until we have this all figured out, Emma must dance and we must eat) so on those occasions I've considered this Extreme Sports -Mom Style!
Like any sporting enthusiast, I have all the right equipment for these "outings", the potty, turning the back of my SUV into a personal oasis, for my "Big Girl" in training. A fold up potty seat, for the public washrooms so we don't lose her in the BIG toilets, and of course 62 changes of clothes for those just- in- case moments. She thinks it's pretty funny to go "pee" in the back of the truck as do passersby as they do a double take, just to make sure that they really are seeing what they are seeing. A couple of moms at ballet commented on my own port-a-potty system, but hey whatever works right! The pee MUST make it to the potty! And while "going" in the Costco washroom we made a few ladies laugh at the potty party we had after Elise made a deposit! I'm sure it was strange to hear clapping and cheering coming from the stall over, believe me it's weird to do it, but again, whatever works! Thank goodness my mother- in- law was there, as she explained what the big deal was!And so for the last 4 days, my life has revolved around my almost three- year- old and the potty, and my latest blog entry is reduced to this.....I apologize!
I don't know how many times I have asked her, "Do you have to pee? Do you need to use the potty? Are you wet?" "How about now,..... now,........ now Elise,........ how about now?"
I am annoying myself let alone her, and most recently she answered, "NOOOO Mommy! Jeepers!"
Or my personal favourite so far, "Elise, going to the potty is a "poopy" job, but someone has to do it."
"Then YOU do it Mommy!" said after day two when I thought she had given up, but she didn't, she has persevered, each day drier than the last.
My quest right now is to convince her that poop goes in the same place, and not her pants. By day 4 this is still proving to be a problem, bribes of chocolate, a new toy, money, a vacation in the Bahamas, a day at the spa, are just not working. I know she'll finally let go and do it, in the mean time I've come up with some rules:
1) Elise is in control
2)I am NOT in control
3)When in doubt refer to rules number 1 and 2.
I must go and see if a potty break is in order! Until next time, my friends, wish us luck that we finally get our "poop in a group" and that my next entries are a little more profound than potty adventures!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Public Washroom Adventures
Kids are great aren't they? Who knew that when you had them, it would be a very long time until you were able to use the bathroom by yourself, or just how much fun you would have while using public facilities! Oh the adventures we've had over the years and oh how many more are to come!
Going to the public bathroom when your kids learn to talk is a phenomenon all of its own. The sights sounds and smells take on a whole new meaning in their little minds. Am I right? We try to quickly go in do our business and be on our merry way, but with my kids that hasn't happened just yet.
Before grocery shopping I had to go really bad, and was running through the parking lot to get to the bathroom, holding Elise in a football hold and dragging Emma by the hand almost flying her like a kite! As I am emptying my bladder Emma has to make her own color commentary, "Wow Mommy, you just keep peeing and peeing! Too much coffee again?"
I hear a snicker from the stall beside me, and I answer, "Yup, I guess so!"
It was Emma's turn and she comments on her own success, "I peed just as long as you this time Mommy! Maybe I'll even poop and I'll be the winner!"
More snickers from outside the stall, "Emma, going to the bathroom isn't really a competition there are no prizes for doing your business."
"Yes there is, you give Elise a chocolate every time she goes!"
(Touché.) "She's just learning and that's what I did with you, the party is over once you figure it out."
"Hmmmm....well I think it should be a party every time!"
"There isn't enough chocolate in the world to satisfy that dream Emma."
"Oh."
There have been many a comment on how much it stinks sometimes, and Elise voiced her opinion on the matter not too long ago. While waiting for Emma we hear "noises" from another stall, and even as an adult I still laugh at that, but manage to keep it to a minimum, until my baby said,
"OOPS! Hers FAAARRRTTTEEDDD!"
( Her famous tag line for when she does the ever so polite art of butt noises.) I do my very best to NOT let the girls see my reaction as it will start an uproar on all of our parts. Got myself under control, and then Elise looks under the door and yells,
"Oh! Hers poopin' mommy! She's got a stinky butt, stinky butt stinky butt!"
I grab her arm and pull her from under the stall, apologize to the woman, and quickly make our escape so that I can just unleash the laughter and snorts to go along with it!
"But Mommy! We didn't wash our hands!"
"It's okay, I have hand sanitizer in my purse, let's go!"
I look forward to the days when going to the bathroom is just that, going to the bathroom , but the immature side of me loves that we, as a family, can make memories everywhere we "go"! So let's hear your funny public washroom displays, I KNOW you have them!
Going to the public bathroom when your kids learn to talk is a phenomenon all of its own. The sights sounds and smells take on a whole new meaning in their little minds. Am I right? We try to quickly go in do our business and be on our merry way, but with my kids that hasn't happened just yet.
Before grocery shopping I had to go really bad, and was running through the parking lot to get to the bathroom, holding Elise in a football hold and dragging Emma by the hand almost flying her like a kite! As I am emptying my bladder Emma has to make her own color commentary, "Wow Mommy, you just keep peeing and peeing! Too much coffee again?"
I hear a snicker from the stall beside me, and I answer, "Yup, I guess so!"
It was Emma's turn and she comments on her own success, "I peed just as long as you this time Mommy! Maybe I'll even poop and I'll be the winner!"
More snickers from outside the stall, "Emma, going to the bathroom isn't really a competition there are no prizes for doing your business."
"Yes there is, you give Elise a chocolate every time she goes!"
(Touché.) "She's just learning and that's what I did with you, the party is over once you figure it out."
"Hmmmm....well I think it should be a party every time!"
"There isn't enough chocolate in the world to satisfy that dream Emma."
"Oh."
There have been many a comment on how much it stinks sometimes, and Elise voiced her opinion on the matter not too long ago. While waiting for Emma we hear "noises" from another stall, and even as an adult I still laugh at that, but manage to keep it to a minimum, until my baby said,
"OOPS! Hers FAAARRRTTTEEDDD!"
( Her famous tag line for when she does the ever so polite art of butt noises.) I do my very best to NOT let the girls see my reaction as it will start an uproar on all of our parts. Got myself under control, and then Elise looks under the door and yells,
"Oh! Hers poopin' mommy! She's got a stinky butt, stinky butt stinky butt!"
I grab her arm and pull her from under the stall, apologize to the woman, and quickly make our escape so that I can just unleash the laughter and snorts to go along with it!
"But Mommy! We didn't wash our hands!"
"It's okay, I have hand sanitizer in my purse, let's go!"
I look forward to the days when going to the bathroom is just that, going to the bathroom , but the immature side of me loves that we, as a family, can make memories everywhere we "go"! So let's hear your funny public washroom displays, I KNOW you have them!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Moments of Pride
Three events, although separate, had the same outcome....
Which leads me to my oldest daughter Emma. She is a very shy and sensitive soul. She takes much caution in everything that she does, making sure that she does things right the first time in order to please. When things go wrong or she gets hurt in some of those processes she tends to give up for the time being and address the matters at another time. Through the years I found this to be frustrating , and was worried about her future in this great big world. (People tend to get eaten up when they've shown so much vulnerability, especially girls.) She has inspired me on many occasions with her will and determination, and taught me to" relax", she'll figure things out on her own time.
We've been asking her if she is ready for her training wheels to come off since last summer and the answer was always no. She decided that last Sunday was the time to do it. You could see the excitement and fear in her eyes, as her dad held her up and gave her instructions. My cousin and I were cheering her on, snapping pictures, and giving her encouragement. She tried and tried, scared of falling, but still wanted to figure it out. After about an hour, she walked away from it, again, I was disappointed that she was "giving up" but knew that she would tackle it again later. And she did, this time it was me holding her up and giving her the" pep" talk. It wasn't long and she was on her way, riding and balancing and trusting herself that she could do it. She was so excited as she rode, screaming and giggling, "Look Mommy! I'm really doing it!!!! I did what you said and believed in myself!" Right there I realized that I won't have to worry about her future, she has it figured out at the ripe old age of five. I pray she continues on with her will and determination and that she will remember how she felt the day she rode her bike without training wheels, for it was a day that she proved to herself, and the world, that she can do anything.
And finally, my cousin had her own milestone, that we celebrated. She is an amazing young woman in her 20's, full of love for life and all that it brings, and you just can't help but smile when you are around her. She holds a special place in my heart, a soft spot really. Emma is her biggest fan too, her patience with my kids was in short, remarkable! We made plans for her to come here and visit for the weekend, she recently suffered a broken heart and, I wanted her to have fun and forget the stupid boy that, for a short time, made her doubt herself and her ability to be loved.
We had a fun filled jam packed weekend and she made a decision to go on a date with a new fellow, but wasn't sure she was going to go through with it. I encouraged her to go for it, and with a new hairdo, a nervous stomach and a rockin' outfit she was off. (She took life by the horns and let it ride!) The woman I know and love is back to believing in herself and knowing that love is out there, and that she will find it. Who knows who her "Mr. Right" is, but when she finds him he better sit down, hold on, and be thankful to the ones before him that let her get away. Life with her will be exciting, non-stop, and full of a love that will inspire those that we secretly envy.
We three women, though at different stages in our life held a common ground. One full of pride, and confidence and moments that we all shared together. I had my "15 minutes of fame", Emma learned to ride her bike and my cousin learned to get back on hers. Moments where we let go and believed that we could accomplish the specific goals that we had set before us. We didn't cure cancer but in our own ways we gained a little more confidence, and coming from a woman that has just learned how to gain confidence instead of fat, it was a week of momentous strides!
For me, writing is fun and a hobby. For years I was just putting my stories in an email and sending them off to family and friends. I didn't think much of my stories, just used them as ways to keep in touch. I have been told by many people that I need to write and share it with the world. I didn't really pay much attention to the praise, as the compliments came from my family and friends, and thought, well they have to be nice me! I have a very bad trait of not believing in myself, one that I do my very best NOT to pass onto my girls. I constantly tell them to "Believe in Yourself"! (So much that I painted it on Emma's wall!) And so I tell myself the same thing and do my best to listen! I am currently working on the "new" me through many different ways and I know that I must lead and guide my girls by example.
My friend Lindsay, helped me out just a month ago and gave my name to the publisher of the online magazine called www.realwomanontherun.com , she had a look at my blog and asked me to submit. I was pretty shocked, ecstatic, scared and sick to my stomach all at the at time. Together we came up with my submission and voila! my story is out there for the world to see. A very proud moment for me, as I was recognised as Catharine, not just Emma and Elise's mom! A moment when I Believed in Myself.
Which leads me to my oldest daughter Emma. She is a very shy and sensitive soul. She takes much caution in everything that she does, making sure that she does things right the first time in order to please. When things go wrong or she gets hurt in some of those processes she tends to give up for the time being and address the matters at another time. Through the years I found this to be frustrating , and was worried about her future in this great big world. (People tend to get eaten up when they've shown so much vulnerability, especially girls.) She has inspired me on many occasions with her will and determination, and taught me to" relax", she'll figure things out on her own time. We've been asking her if she is ready for her training wheels to come off since last summer and the answer was always no. She decided that last Sunday was the time to do it. You could see the excitement and fear in her eyes, as her dad held her up and gave her instructions. My cousin and I were cheering her on, snapping pictures, and giving her encouragement. She tried and tried, scared of falling, but still wanted to figure it out. After about an hour, she walked away from it, again, I was disappointed that she was "giving up" but knew that she would tackle it again later. And she did, this time it was me holding her up and giving her the" pep" talk. It wasn't long and she was on her way, riding and balancing and trusting herself that she could do it. She was so excited as she rode, screaming and giggling, "Look Mommy! I'm really doing it!!!! I did what you said and believed in myself!" Right there I realized that I won't have to worry about her future, she has it figured out at the ripe old age of five. I pray she continues on with her will and determination and that she will remember how she felt the day she rode her bike without training wheels, for it was a day that she proved to herself, and the world, that she can do anything.
And finally, my cousin had her own milestone, that we celebrated. She is an amazing young woman in her 20's, full of love for life and all that it brings, and you just can't help but smile when you are around her. She holds a special place in my heart, a soft spot really. Emma is her biggest fan too, her patience with my kids was in short, remarkable! We made plans for her to come here and visit for the weekend, she recently suffered a broken heart and, I wanted her to have fun and forget the stupid boy that, for a short time, made her doubt herself and her ability to be loved.
We had a fun filled jam packed weekend and she made a decision to go on a date with a new fellow, but wasn't sure she was going to go through with it. I encouraged her to go for it, and with a new hairdo, a nervous stomach and a rockin' outfit she was off. (She took life by the horns and let it ride!) The woman I know and love is back to believing in herself and knowing that love is out there, and that she will find it. Who knows who her "Mr. Right" is, but when she finds him he better sit down, hold on, and be thankful to the ones before him that let her get away. Life with her will be exciting, non-stop, and full of a love that will inspire those that we secretly envy.
We three women, though at different stages in our life held a common ground. One full of pride, and confidence and moments that we all shared together. I had my "15 minutes of fame", Emma learned to ride her bike and my cousin learned to get back on hers. Moments where we let go and believed that we could accomplish the specific goals that we had set before us. We didn't cure cancer but in our own ways we gained a little more confidence, and coming from a woman that has just learned how to gain confidence instead of fat, it was a week of momentous strides!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
3 Easy Steps My A**!!!!!
Due to the recent "shut-down" of my link to this blog on Facebook, I am now regretting not going through with post secondary education! I've been able to coast through life without having a degree or student loans to pay off, but it seems as though a simple copy and paste system is too much for my brain to handle.
Facebook decided that since people were sharing my link on their own pages( thank-you for that!) and people were clicking it, they need a piece of the action too.( Granted it's a free site so why not. )
I, at first thought they were censoring me,( which, I still think they sort of are,) but no, we need to link hand in hand and "share" so everything will be fine. I follow the directions on the "Wizard" portion of "connect with facebook" . In 3 Easy Steps I'll be on my way! Should have been easy enough, I gave birth to two kids, this will be a walk in the "copy & paste" park!
Well either I'm a stupid "Wizard" or Facebook is because it won't let me get past step two.
"click to download file" (click!)
"open file?" (yes!)
A blank screen pops up, and I wait, waiting, wait, waiting.......no extra boxes, no bars to look at just a page that is blank. Hmmmm..... okay let's start over.
"click to download file" (click..)
"open file?" (yes..)
Same blank screen, and more waiting, waiting, waiting......no extra boxes, no bars to look at just a page that is blank. HHMMMMM......I MUST be missing something, try again.
"click to download file" (CLICK.....Mother Trucker CLICK!)
"open file?" (YYYYEEEESSSSSSSSS...........!!!!)
Like I'm at the horse track waiting for my horse to win I sit in anticipation, talking to the screen,
"Come on, come on, come on, go, go, go!"
BING!
Same blank screen, nothing to look at, but a blank flippin' screen!! AAARRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!
I click another button, "upload later" and continue through more EASY steps of copy this and paste that on your site....okay simple enough. I navigate through both sites copy and paste, copy and paste, copy and paste......SAVE.....
"File saved". (that's right, take that!)
Would you like to test?
Why yes, yes I would......(click!)
To my amazement, I see the ever-loving Facebook icon on my blog! I did it!
Click on the "share" button like a good girl, because life and apparently Facebook, are all about sharing!
Waiting, waiting, cheering that my horse crosses the finish line this time.....
"website content has been reported abusive by Facebook users" okay!"
NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! It's not OKAY! I will not click OKAY!
Now that I am completely frustrated, I shut it down and walk away, I'll look at it again later,( gave myself a time-out.) Later came, and later went, same outcome, more frustration. And so my friends we cannot play nice and "share" on Facebook. At this point it is NOT good for my mental health and I choose to stay in my corner before I throw an all out tantrum on the floor! Or I may break into the vodka right now, but Corey won't be home until after the children are in bed, and I have to drive to hip hop. (Although the vodka may enhance my hip hop moves......) no, no, I just will not try and "share"!
I will "blog on" and let you know when there is a new entry, so you can read on. Thanks for all your support and for enjoying a "look" through the window to my life, and finding amusement because you can "relate" to my everyday shenanigans!
Facebook decided that since people were sharing my link on their own pages( thank-you for that!) and people were clicking it, they need a piece of the action too.( Granted it's a free site so why not. )
I, at first thought they were censoring me,( which, I still think they sort of are,) but no, we need to link hand in hand and "share" so everything will be fine. I follow the directions on the "Wizard" portion of "connect with facebook" . In 3 Easy Steps I'll be on my way! Should have been easy enough, I gave birth to two kids, this will be a walk in the "copy & paste" park!
Well either I'm a stupid "Wizard" or Facebook is because it won't let me get past step two.
"click to download file" (click!)
"open file?" (yes!)
A blank screen pops up, and I wait, waiting, wait, waiting.......no extra boxes, no bars to look at just a page that is blank. Hmmmm..... okay let's start over.
"click to download file" (click..)
"open file?" (yes..)
Same blank screen, and more waiting, waiting, waiting......no extra boxes, no bars to look at just a page that is blank. HHMMMMM......I MUST be missing something, try again.
"click to download file" (CLICK.....Mother Trucker CLICK!)
"open file?" (YYYYEEEESSSSSSSSS...........!!!!)
Like I'm at the horse track waiting for my horse to win I sit in anticipation, talking to the screen,
"Come on, come on, come on, go, go, go!"
BING!
Same blank screen, nothing to look at, but a blank flippin' screen!! AAARRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!
I click another button, "upload later" and continue through more EASY steps of copy this and paste that on your site....okay simple enough. I navigate through both sites copy and paste, copy and paste, copy and paste......SAVE.....
"File saved". (that's right, take that!)
Would you like to test?
Why yes, yes I would......(click!)
To my amazement, I see the ever-loving Facebook icon on my blog! I did it!
Click on the "share" button like a good girl, because life and apparently Facebook, are all about sharing!
Waiting, waiting, cheering that my horse crosses the finish line this time.....
"website content has been reported abusive by Facebook users" okay!"
NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! It's not OKAY! I will not click OKAY!
Now that I am completely frustrated, I shut it down and walk away, I'll look at it again later,( gave myself a time-out.) Later came, and later went, same outcome, more frustration. And so my friends we cannot play nice and "share" on Facebook. At this point it is NOT good for my mental health and I choose to stay in my corner before I throw an all out tantrum on the floor! Or I may break into the vodka right now, but Corey won't be home until after the children are in bed, and I have to drive to hip hop. (Although the vodka may enhance my hip hop moves......) no, no, I just will not try and "share"!
I will "blog on" and let you know when there is a new entry, so you can read on. Thanks for all your support and for enjoying a "look" through the window to my life, and finding amusement because you can "relate" to my everyday shenanigans!
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